Christmas for Muslim Reverts

Aaaahhh Christmas - it comes up time and again.

There is alot to talk about Christmas, since it is really the hype of the year. I am not here to analyse or comment too much on the festivity, since for many many and many many years that I was living in Europe, I learned alot about Christmas - the good, the bad and the ugly. The last two I learned from people who did not practice Christianity but were all out there to have a jolly good time doing everything but good.

I think due to the bad and the ugly, not everyone finds Christmas as the time of the year to reflect and find solace.

I know another group of people who may find Christmas a little difficult. Muslim reverts who were formally followers of the Christian faith. It takes baby steps for many reverts to help their families come to terms with their reversion. It's not easy - some parents are far more accepting than others, while others shun their children away. There are those though who accept but would like to share the holiday cheer with their family, including family members who have reverted to Islam.

I suspect it is difficult "losing" a child to a different faith and I also suspect that it is difficult for new reverts to not visit their parents during Christmas. Parents hold special status in Islam, regardless of their religious beliefs: Keep their company with kindness in this world, and follow the path of him who turns to Me. Then unto Me will you return, and I shall tell you what you did. (Luqman: 15)

If you feel you are in this position and are not quite sure how to handle Christmas invitations from family, there are several fatwa found on Islam Online that will help guide you. Visit their fatwa bank.

The consensus among scholars is that you are allowed (and in fact, encouraged) to visit your parents and partake in feasts and even the exchanging of gifts. However, please steer away from any forms of worship that compromise Islamic principles. In fact you should also avoid anything else that would deter your steadfastness in faith, such as alcohol and free mingling with other guests who are not your Mahram.

Simple enough, insha'Allah. We try our best to make the best out of every situation and Allah Ta'ala provides us felxibility to live in this world - provided we do not transgress His guidelines.

And We have recommended to man his parents; his mother bore him in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning was in two years. Thank Me and your two parents. To Me is the return. But if they try to force you to associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not. (Luqman: 13).

Celebrating Thanksgiving and Christmas

New friends, colleagues and acquaintances ask if I celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas. The old group of friends, colleagues and acquaintances know what I do--but the new guys don't. They are always careful when asking this question, even though I have a very casual and laid back attitude. (My theory is let people ask any question as long as their intent is to really learn about a new culture or religion.) So, I thought of YOU the reader as well.

Now, just like any other religion out there--you have extremes of everything. What I mean is you have those who don't practice just carry the title, those who do practice and are considered the "moderates", and those who go for the strictest interpretations and ideas. I want to point out that I don't represent everyone as a Muslim because you will find different ideas and theories on different subjects--just like every in every culture and religion.

So, let's talk about Thanksgiving. Although, originally it was to give thanks to God for the pilgrims' survival successes--today, it is a time for family and friends to get together for fun. Some Americans don't even cook turkey or ham on the fourth Thursday of November. My family sometimes cook and don't depending if people have time or are in the mood. But to tell you the truth, I don't know one single American who actually celebrates this day for its original purpose. Sometimes this holiday gets overlooked by Halloween and jumps right into Christmas.

Christmas isn't foreign to us Muslims. Many Muslims, in other countries, have lived with Christians side by side for centuries, so they both know each other's cultures and expectations. Everyone knows that Christmas is commercialized, and that to find the true meaning of Christmas you would have to dig between commercials, decorations and the food. Then you have some Christian Americans who point out that Christmas has pagan origins, and so it should be celebrated around late fall.

Some households put up extravagant Christmas decorations causing their electric bill to be hundreds of dollars (some actually have in the thousands--depending on how large the home is and how much decorations) in one month. Christmas music is constantly played for two months.

Most Muslim Americans, to my knowledge, do not celebrate for Christmas. However, some do tell their neighbors or colleagues "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays", and exchange gifts or cards. Others may not tell their neighbors or colleagues. I know some Muslims, including myself, like the Christmas atmosphere because it is happy-like. Some Muslims even say it reminds them of the atmosphere of Ramadan (where we fast for about 29 or 30 days).

I don't go out of my way to tell people "Merry Christmas", however, if I do see them for whatever reason, I do mention it to them because I think it is the right thing to do, an etiquette thing. You remember them, and chances are they remember you.

More Americans are starting to know more about Islam and its details, yet there is a long way to go--however it is a great start! I would be interested in knowing what you do for Thanksgiving and Christmas. How do you as Muslims or non Muslims handle those who do or don't celebrate what you celebrate?