Help Needed for Muslim Daughters in New York

This is a good deed for Muslims in New York.

I received this email via one of my yahoogroups. Normally, we are not allowed to disperse information beyond the circle but this is an obvious exception.

Asalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatu

The rewards for visiting the sick are great in both number and magnitude....

The Prophet Muhammad sallahAllahu aleyhi waSalam said:"If a man calls on his sick Muslim brother, it is as if he walks reaping the fruits of Paradise until he sits, and when he sits he is showered in mercy, and if this was in the morning, seventy thousand angels send prayers upon him until the evening, and if this was in the evening, seventy thousand angels send prayers upon him until themorning." (Al-Tirmidhi)

With that said: I don't know if people heard of the tragic gas explosion that severely burned 4 Yemeni girls October 6th. It has been almost two months and no sister has visited any of these little girls, may Allah heal them and grant them the highest Jannah for their courage and strength.

As to not overcrowd the children or overwhelm them, please go only in small groups, If you can bring gifts at all, that would be wonderful. Please see contact person below.

Here is some information about the family: The father, Rasas Alghaithi, a recent immigrant from Yemen, is the sole surviving parent of the gas explosion, which destroyed their apartment building. Four of his five daughters experienced burns over 80% of their bodies. The daughter that was spared had gone out with her father, when the explosion occurred.masha'llaah.

Since the explosion, October 6th, the recovery of the two youngest has MashaAllah been miraculous! One is up and about, paintingand playing, with the nurses. The two older daughters are still unstable on ventilators, tube feedings...etc.]

Two are on the 6th floor,and two are on the 8th floor. Although on different floors, two visitors ONLY are allowed per child at one time. And it is best, forthe two girls who are still unstable,[both in the same room], one visitor for each. This would be best to maintain the dignity of all concerned, insha'llah.

The girls names are Du'a, Tuqaa, Leena', and Afaaf. Please remember: They do not know their mother has died.

Note Well: ANY AND ALL GIFTS[ TOYS, CLOTHES, MUST BE IN THEIR ORIGINAL PACKAGING. The girls range from 3 to 9 years old. The 2 youngest girls are scheduled to be discharged within the next 10 days to temporary housing near City College, Convent House[138th Street & ConventAvenue]

They are in need of household things, especially rugs for the kids' room, bedding etc.

The girls are at Weill Medical College of Cornell University525 E 68th StNew York, NY 10021-4870, US Hospital number is 212-746-5000

There's a contact person to call: Sarah Musa 614-354-7417I recommend anyone who wants to help or visit to give her a call.

Visiting hours are over at 8pm. If you would like to donate items to furnish their new home, please call Sarah to inquire on the specifics.

Items can be dropped off in the box at the IC of NYU (until 10pm onweekdays)or directly to where they will be staying (10-4:30pm)at:

The Convent Avenue Living Centerc/o Eugena Simpson,
Case Manager34 Convent Avenue
[Manhattan, 5 blocks south of City College]
Suite#3 NY, NY 10027
phone # 866-7816 Ext:20

Once again, Cash can be given to Khalid Latif or Prof. Shair of NYU. Checks or money orders can be made out and sent to:

Accident Victims Relief Fund, Inc. [Algaithi, Rasas]
Kramer & Pollack,
Attorneys at Lawc/o Joshua Pollack,
Esq.225 Broadway Suite 613
New York, NY 10007

Vlog1: Meet me, your average Arab girl!

I like to give her credit because she is embarking on an ambitious project at 17 and 1/2 years of age to educate on Arab cultures. Imagine if all Muslims and Arabs each worked on their own projects to inform society about our cultures?

Love Thine Baby!

One minute you are a care free, irresponsible girl (woman) waking up at midday, eating ice cream and lounging around listening to music. Or you are that flighty career woman always on the move, with work motivating your life.

Next minute you have a baby. So it may take half and hour, it make 48 half-an-hours, but every Muslimah knows life will never be the same again. Children are so important in Islam that nearly all Muslim women rearrange their lives to suit their bundles of joy.

I read this article on Baby Center and it was brilliant!

I love the poop part. LOL.

What changes when you have a baby? A better question may be: What doesn't change? Here, writer and mom Rebecca Woolf lists her most notable post-baby observations. Then scroll down to read our favorite comments from readers about how their babies changed their lives.

1. You finally stop to smell the roses, because your baby is in your arms.
2. Where you once believed you were fearless, you now find yourself afraid.
3. The sacrifices you thought you made to have a child no longer seem like sacrifices.
4. You respect your body ... finally.
5. You respect your parents and love them in a new way.
6. You find that your baby's pain feels much worse than your own.
7. You believe once again in the things you believed in as a child.
8. You lose touch with the people in your life whom you should have banished years ago.
9. Your heart breaks much more easily.
10. You think of someone else 234,836,178,976 times a day.
11. Every day is a surprise.
12. Bodily functions are no longer repulsive. In fact, they please you. (Hooray for poop!)
13. You look at your baby in the mirror instead of yourself.
14. You become a morning person.
15. Your love becomes limitless, a superhuman power.

And from our readers...
1. "You discover how much there is to say about one tooth." — Ashley's mom
2. "You finally realize that true joy doesn't come from material wealth." — Anonymous
3. "You now know where the sun comes from." — Charlotte
4. "You'd rather buy a plastic tricycle than those shoes that you've been dying to have." — Sophie's mom
5. "You realize that although sticky, lollipops have magical powers." — Roxanne
6. "You don't mind going to bed at 9 p.m. on Friday night." — Kellye
7. "Silence? What's that?" — Anonymous
8. "You realize that the 15 pounds you can't seem to get rid of are totally worth having." — Brenda
9. "You discover an inner strength you never thought you had." — Ronin and Brookie's mom
10. "You no longer rely on a clock — your baby now sets your schedule." — Thomas' mom
11. "You give parents with a screaming child an 'I-know-the-feeling' look instead of a 'Can't-they-shut-him-up?' one." — Jaidyn's mom
12. "Your dog — who used to be your 'baby' — becomes just a dog." — Kara
13. "You take the time for one more hug and kiss even if it means you'll be late." — Tracey
14. "You learn that taking a shower is a luxury." — Jayden's mom
15. "You realize that you can love a complete stranger." — Dezarae's mom

Everyone agree?

10 Greatest Recitations of Surat Al-Fatiha

I thought this video was awesome because it showed some of the best recitations of Surat Al-Fatiha from different parts of the Muslim world.

What's in Mama's Milk?

An American OBGYN met with an Egyptian OBGYN. He was facing a predicament. Two mothers had given birth to two babies - one a baby girl and the other a baby boy. Both mothers were under the impression that the baby boy belonged to them.

This happened long before the exitence of DNA determination and the American doctor felt he was at a dead-end in resolving this dispute.

The Egyptian doctor recommended that he consult a wise man in Eqypt, an ulema. The two doctors described the situation to the ulema.

The ulema replied, "test both mothers' breast milk and you will find a difference in their constituents."

The American doctor upon returning home, did as what he was requested. What he found in both mothers' breastmilk was shocking.

One mother had double the nutrients of the other mother. For every unit of protein of one mother, the other had 2. For every unit of minerals in the same mother, the other had 2.

He quickly reported this findings back to his Egyptian comrade. The Egyptian OBGYN consulted the ulema once again.

The ulema then relayed, "the mother with double the nutrients in her milk, is the mother to the baby boy."

As men inherit double than women, under normal circumstances reflects that men need the extra portion. Under inheritance law, men are provided with double of his female counterparts because family, including his wife, children, parents, sisters and sometimes even aunts, are dependants on a man's earnings. A woman enjoys financial freedom over her money, property and inheritance.

Accordingly, men need more than women, when it comes to earning and inheritance. The same way, baby boys need more than baby girls when growing up. Ask any mother and she will agree that her son drinks more, eats more, is more active, than her daughters. Boys and girls are different and through our physical observation, this is apparent. Boys are generally bigger and stronger than girls - and though they mature slower and take time to catch up physically, at the end of puberty - men are still physically bigger and stronger. They just need that extra more nutrients.

My family doctor had told me that story during a sick visit to the clinic. My son was ill for the first time. She asked what he drank, and I said Mama's Milk.

She says there has been no research done on breast milk to validate the story, but through her observation and experience, many more baby boys, as compared to baby girls - who are formula-fed - fall sick. Obviously formula milk is not identical to Mama's Milk - they are deficient in several nutrients - but imagine that baby boys do not receive the constituents they would need as compared to their sisters if they are not breastfed.

This is just a thought. Allah know best. After all, He provides Mama's Milk to both baby boys and girls.

Celebrating Thanksgiving and Christmas

New friends, colleagues and acquaintances ask if I celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas. The old group of friends, colleagues and acquaintances know what I do--but the new guys don't. They are always careful when asking this question, even though I have a very casual and laid back attitude. (My theory is let people ask any question as long as their intent is to really learn about a new culture or religion.) So, I thought of YOU the reader as well.

Now, just like any other religion out there--you have extremes of everything. What I mean is you have those who don't practice just carry the title, those who do practice and are considered the "moderates", and those who go for the strictest interpretations and ideas. I want to point out that I don't represent everyone as a Muslim because you will find different ideas and theories on different subjects--just like every in every culture and religion.

So, let's talk about Thanksgiving. Although, originally it was to give thanks to God for the pilgrims' survival successes--today, it is a time for family and friends to get together for fun. Some Americans don't even cook turkey or ham on the fourth Thursday of November. My family sometimes cook and don't depending if people have time or are in the mood. But to tell you the truth, I don't know one single American who actually celebrates this day for its original purpose. Sometimes this holiday gets overlooked by Halloween and jumps right into Christmas.

Christmas isn't foreign to us Muslims. Many Muslims, in other countries, have lived with Christians side by side for centuries, so they both know each other's cultures and expectations. Everyone knows that Christmas is commercialized, and that to find the true meaning of Christmas you would have to dig between commercials, decorations and the food. Then you have some Christian Americans who point out that Christmas has pagan origins, and so it should be celebrated around late fall.

Some households put up extravagant Christmas decorations causing their electric bill to be hundreds of dollars (some actually have in the thousands--depending on how large the home is and how much decorations) in one month. Christmas music is constantly played for two months.

Most Muslim Americans, to my knowledge, do not celebrate for Christmas. However, some do tell their neighbors or colleagues "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays", and exchange gifts or cards. Others may not tell their neighbors or colleagues. I know some Muslims, including myself, like the Christmas atmosphere because it is happy-like. Some Muslims even say it reminds them of the atmosphere of Ramadan (where we fast for about 29 or 30 days).

I don't go out of my way to tell people "Merry Christmas", however, if I do see them for whatever reason, I do mention it to them because I think it is the right thing to do, an etiquette thing. You remember them, and chances are they remember you.

More Americans are starting to know more about Islam and its details, yet there is a long way to go--however it is a great start! I would be interested in knowing what you do for Thanksgiving and Christmas. How do you as Muslims or non Muslims handle those who do or don't celebrate what you celebrate?

"Classroom Discipline" this weekend for those in the Philly area

WHAT: Free teaching workshop on "Classroom Discipline"

WHO: Teachers of weekend schools, homeschools, and/or full-time Islamic schools in the greater Philadelphia area - ADULTS ONLY.

WHERE: Villanova Foundation for Islamic Education, 1860 Montgomery Avenue, Villanova, PA 19085

WHEN: Saturday, November 17th at 2:30 PM

WHY: Help educators further develop their teaching techniques, as well as serve as a meeting ground and encourage networking among area Islamic schools.

HOW: Registration is required for attending this meeting. ADULTS ONLY PLEASE. Register via email (preferred) or phone.

Contact information is listed at the end of this email. Contact information:

FarheenKF@gmail.com or (610) 935-0613

You're Invited to Attend the GCC House Party

GCC House Party!!!

Date(s): 2007-11-16

Description: It’s Time to Caucus! Greater Chicago Caucus House Party!!!

WHEN: Friday, November 16th, 6 to 9 p.m.

LOCATION: At the Residence of Nazneen Mashoni:141 Southwicke Dr. Streamwood, IL 60107

Nazneen’s Home: 630-497-9177

COST: Suggested donation at the door: $10

It’s time to get together, meet with some elected officials, learn about candidates, and receive issue updates on immigration, education, transportation and the war! Bring a friend or two and join us for a night of food, fun and friends!!!

For more information or to RSVP:Julie Heun at julie@greaterchicago.org or 312-401-4321

Honeymooners in Peril

Has anyone ever been subjected to this type of discrimination? It's really quite frightening and frustrating to know that just because Muslims dress a little differently that they should be vulnerable to personal violation.

I say "dress differently" rather than "look different" because the sister who was on honeymoon goes by the name of Katharine Klausing. Does that sound Middle Eastern you you? Or remotely Asian? Does it sound anything like our African brothers or sisters?

It is a pity the locals did not even have the courtesy to request a search from Abo Namous, even if they had no warrant to inspect the premise. It is a pity that could not respect the right of Klausing to cover as she wished before having men enter her house.

It is ironic though, in an Asian country, a white couple would be ever so welcomed to enter stores, cafes, homes. Sometimes I find it quite comical the way Asians (some Muslims) wait on hand and foot on Western guests, no matter how educated these Asians are. In fact, it seems like a recognition at times, to know Europeans, or even Americans for that matter. I don't know why. It baffles me.

But honestly, how do you combat these type of violations? True, there are some bad people out there, in the guise of Muslims, who are really and truly blind about Islam and what it stands for.

But there are also millions of innocent Muslims and Arabs around the world. I just wonder how many have fallen prey to prejudice.

Getting to Know Arabs

When I was first invited to co-blog here, I was somewhat apprehensive. I love writing in all of its sense but I mostly feel comfortable if I knew what I was writing about. I guess that would mean the same for other writers.

I am thankful though that Humanist gave me this opportunity. It made me read up a little more, study a little harder and think a little deeper.

I don't know many Arabs to be honest. I know a few, but none really on a personal level.

I was once invited to a lunch at the Saudi Ambassador's residence when I was on holiday in Geneva. When I say on holiday, it means I had a study break, and when I say Geneva, it was where my dad was working at that holiday break in time.

Anyway, my mum was active with the United Nations' Women's Guild and the ladies there would rotate entertaining luncheons and other get-together activities.

The lunch was really grand, and so was the residence.

Firstly we were stopped at the entrance with all the ither invitees and were chauffered from the gate to the house, troop by troop. That was a weird experience. I am pretty sure I could have walked.

The lunch was great though. There was plenty to eat and the food was awesome masha'Allah. Never have I enjoyed food like that. The walls were lined with salads and yoghurts and all sorts of yummies with cream. There was plenty of bread and a lamb at the end of the aisle. I love lamb. I love food. Now I know I love Arab food. LOL

The hostess was a sure one of the mostest. When I first met her in public, she was dressed as her comrades were dressed - modestly - in black and observed the full hijab. Just in case there are men reading this, I will not mention what she was wearing when we were there, but she looked gorgeous and worth a million dollars.

In between stuffing my face with all the goodies, I tried not to talk to the other ladies. I was not being rude or anything, but at that age... sitting there with your mum's buddies, let's just say I would rather eat than talk about the weather.

The usual questions flew by though... where are you from? How long have you been here? How do you like it in Geneva? How old are you? That was directed to me obviously.

However, I noticed two ladies at the end of our table who were doing even less talking than I was. In fact, they were just talking to each other and barely eating. I wondered if it was because they were both blonde and white, whereas the other participants at the table were Asian, African, Middle Eastern even, and many of us were Muslim.

Then a question flew over to them from a Singaporean friend. "Where are YOU from?"

One blonde lady answered, after clearing her throat: The United States of America.

That's all she said. Then she looked back at her friend and back at her food.

Everyone else just looked at each other uncomfortably.

Maybe it was because it was the summer of 2002 and the US had just attacked Iraq. I don't know. But at that point in time, I convinced myself that I was right. They did not talk to us because they were American, unlike me, who refused to talk because I kept eating the lamb.

It must have been weird being American, lounging around in an Arab lady's residence with a load of women from different continents.

After reading Humanist's last post though, I guess I would double-guess myself. What if the 2 American ladies had actually had opposing thoughts to the war than their administration had? After all, they showed up at an Arab's family's house for a lunch. They sat at a table full of apparently foreign people who just kept asking each other where the other came from.

They sat through the lunch and were extremely discreet about themselves being there, unlike the boisterous Asians.

What if they had difficulty accepting the violence in Iraq but had to remain subdued due to their loyalty to the United States of America?

I can second-guess myself now because I'm co-blogging here. Now I'm reading a little more, studying a little harder and thinking alot more deeper.

I never really looked back at the American ladies. Yes, yes, I was too busy stuffing down a date pudding. Years later, I am pretty sure they felt uncomfortable because of the hostile environment their administration caused.

I'm pretty sure.

And I'm pretty sure I could have enjoyed a car-ride down to front gate rather than walk back to the car after all that eating.

Hmm...Are You Trying To Tell Me Something?

I have been teaching at my local university for the past four years. I love it. I teach education. We discuss issues related to education today.

This semester is a bit different. Why? Because this is the first time I have assigned Baghdad Burning : Girl Blog from Iraq for my students to read, so we can discuss in class.

However, I have two students who seem to think I am being "anti-American" because to them I represent an Arab, Muslim, Arab Muslim, or the "other." They have refused to read the book. They display pencil sketches from their notebook paper of an American flag. One of the students is planning to join the military within a year, he announced to the class sometime in the semester.

One student gets all upset if we talk about a different point of view on Iraq. He thinks we are being un-American. I tell him that it is un-American when we can't discuss controversial issues in a democratic manner.

At first, I didn't even pay attention to the displaying of the flag. However, one student purposely displayed the flag standing up looking directly at me. Then I realized...hmmm, are they trying to tell me something?

Just yesterday, as one of the students turned their homework, they had dropped a small, handmade American flag on the floor.

I think they want me to react. I pretend I don't understand what they are doing. I have a feeling they want me to get riled up. I don't and I won't.

When I discuss issues, I talk and think like an American and an Arab.

What do you think I should do? Do leave ideas and opinions in the comment section.

Is Your Marriage a Bed of Roses?

Marriage is highly stressed in Islam, with husbands and wives described as being garments for one another (an-Nur: 30-31). That's nice - we can say alot of nice things about clothes, especially when they are fashionable, comfortable and clean.

Marriage is one of those things that happen in batches. When one couple ties the knot, it seems like everyone else is doing it too. There were weekends where my husband and I were invited to 3-4 weddings held on the same day. Luckily, due to the traditional Malay wedding being a staggered feast that goes on for several hours, it is possible to attend 3 wedding banquets on the same day.

After the wedding however, the opening chapter of marriage begins.

It's not a bed of roses, definitely. Many enthusiastic youngsters who have found their other half tend to look forward to endless sleepovers and chit chats. Allah has other plans though, all geared to make us grow stronger.

Over the few years that I and about a million of my friends have been married, I have noticed a distinct pattern that hits the newly weds. There will always be trouble within the first 6 months of matrimonial harmony.

The most common problem are financial issues. One of the couple usually loses his or her job. This is not intentionally, in most cases but due to other factors such as economic cut backs in companies. Otherwise, it would be the great debt the couple has to bear repaying the wedding loan. That causes substantial financial strain. Suddenly, the gleeful, rather shallow life most of us lived while depending on parents or just taking care of ourselves on a single salary disappears into a nightmare of financial turmoil. I found this most common in most couples.

Secondly, I always find, many newlyweds are separated after marriage. Work, family circumstances, studies - they all amount to some sort of separation where the couple only meet during weekends or holidays. This is strange but I have seen it so many times that it can be quite comical, in a mean way.

There are other problems couples face during the first few months of marriage. Living with in-laws, literally or not, sometimes poses a problems. Especially if the in-laws are the type that have not accepted their son or daughter sharing his or her life with someone else other than them. I guess it is difficult to see a child leave the nest but I have seen couples batter with overbearing parents that cause more distress upon the marriage than harmony.

What else? Babies, oh yes. Miscarriages, difficulty to conceive - all this can happen during the first year. Complicated pregnancies, no less. I've seen them all. And although there is a work around to every problem that Allah throws upon us, many couples find they break before building up strength to overcome their obstacles.

It is probably best to remember that Allah will not place a burden upon ourselves that we are unable to shoulder. And since we are garments to our spouses, it is time to be the best garment yet.

But no matter what the work-around is, nothing can be better for you marriage than complete surrendership to Allah's will, filled with prayers and supplication.

"Verily, for all men and women who have surrendered themselves unto God, and all believing men and believing women, and all truly devout men and truly devout women, and all men and women who are true to their word, and all men and women who are true to their word, and all men and women who are patient in adversity, and all men and women who humble themselves [before God], and all men and women who give in charity, and all self-denying men and self-denying women, and all men and women who are mindful of their chastity, and all men and women who remember God unceasingly, for [all of] them has God readied forgiveness of sins and a mighty reward."
(al-Ahzab: 35)

Acceptance

A non-Muslim friend once mentioned that Muslims seem to cope with death better than non-Muslims. There is an air of calmness when someone passes on in a Muslim family. Family members do not wail or scream out loud in protests of unfairness. No one condemns anyone. Nobody points fingers.

I hoped this was the case, and was glad to know this was her perception on how Muslims dealt with death as it was accurate.

I explained to her that surrendering to Allah Ta'ala and being a Muslim did only comprise of living our lives but also believing in death and the hereafter, as our deeds on earth will be reflected in the latter.

I had a harrowing weekend to say the least.

Someone I care about lost her unborn baby. It is not a loss of life like we know it. In this case, life was never given to the baby. Miscarriages happen, I know. But they usually happen to other people, friends of friends, distant relatives, women who appear on tv. It has never happened to anyone this close to me before.

Fortunately, her acceptance has helped her presevere through the loss and her surrendership to the Creator has helped her understand that sometimes life is not the best thing for everyone. Because of this, she has remained calm, strong and positive. All because she has surrendered to Allah's will.

Another person I love is battling her last days, caving in to cervical cancer. She is living on drugs and alot of reassurance and support from her family and close friends.

Many of her visitors cry when they see her. She is unwell and frail. There is nothing wrong with crying, as it is in our humanness and it shows sorrow that comes from the heart.

But death for Muslims is the natural route of inclination as we say inna lillahi wa inna lillah rajioon. From Allah we come, and to Allah we return.

I must admit that acceptance does not come easily for everyone and until we are in that position, we cannot play judge upon the feelings they are going through. However, during difficult times there is always the reassurance that we do not live in vain. We live for Allah Ta'ala and this gives us reason to remain calm during times of dire stress and uncertainty.

I guess when my friend mentioned that Muslims cope better with death than other people, she actually meant that Muslims accept death better than other people.

And what can we do for those who pass on? Remember their good deeds and at best remember them in our prayers.

Those who pray, Our Lord, forgive us and those who have gone before us in faith and do not leave in our hearts any ill-feeling or malice towards those who cherish faith. (Al-Hashr 59: 10)

My Made in China

Assalamu'Alaykum,

It has happened again. Just when I thought I would be able to get my laptop sorted out, I have been hit with a double whammy. Turns out the lightning did not only hit my phone. Since the phone line was still connected to my laptop at that moment in time, the lightning destroyed my network card too.

After alot of grovelling I guess, by my husband, at the techies department, he had to venture out into the cold and cruel world of repair-smiths. Turns out Multimedia University - the pioneer educators in information technology - did not want to tamper with my run down laptop lest the inevitable happen. But anyway, the techies confirmed all I needed was a new network card.

So there was my husband, collecting my baby's identification card from the registry office when he spotted a computer shop with a counter for repairs. The Guy was so Enthusiastic and Obviously New at the job, he insisted that he wanted to CHECK the insides of my rather outdated Twinhead. Made in China, you see - that was all I could afford 5 years ago when I bought it after a few months of self-earned salary.

So the Enthusiastic and Obviously New Guy grabbed Made in China before my husband could hand it over to him and yanked it open.

The LCD screen broke. I cannot imagine how.... but I do imagine it breaking into half. I imagine it every night in my dreams, which are actually Nightmares.

Now I am pawning my jewellery to pay for the mistake Enthusiastic and Obviously New Guy made because he begged my husband to let him off the hook as the company refused to cough up a cent. He even narrated his salary versus budget figures that were so pathetic that both of us had to cave in.

Yes, I am pawning my jewellery. My husband said no. But I insist.

I am insisting because....

I do not earn a fixed salary anymore out of my choice, not his.

I quit my job because I wanted to, not him.

I left my wonderfully exciting career in investment banking because I decided to, not him.

I wanted and STILL WANT TO take care of my children and he did not force me to.

Unfortunately, due to the existence of people like Enthusiastic and Obviously New Guy, it is getting harder and harder and HARDER to remain at home.

With all the choices I have made, I do not want to rely on my husband for full financial support. Sure, he is rewarded for the money he spends on the family - on me and the babies, but at the same time, I feel it is my duty to contribute positively, especially financially, to our well-being. I mostly want to because I know I can and supporting so many people on a sole income is a tall-order.

I know alot of people think Muslim women stay at home and are chained to the kitchen stove or the children, but you would be surprised to know that it is mostly by choice and you be even MORE SURPRISED to know, that it is not a easy decision for many women to make. This is mostly due to financial reasons, as I mentioned earlier.

That is why I write. Small income but plenty of family time that sometimes drives me up the wall. But now I have found something else that has driven me to the brink of patience. Unethical service providers that are not careful with your belongings and refuse to compensate for damages. That laptop is all I have as my asset capital, non-liquid assets to keep at least a trickle of income tip toeing into my bank account!

Now it is broken. Astarghfirullah. And the only other non-liquid asset that redeemable for cash is a bit of gold jewellery.

I have borrowed my brother in law's laptop for this post and he said I could borrow it until the Enthusiastic and Obviously New Guy calls me again and lets me know Made in China is ready for the pick up. This time I am going to go and see him and let me know my budgetary figures and how my husband keeps the family afloat on one steady income.

I remember once when I was a kid living in Europe, my mum bought a carton of eggs as part of our groceries. When unpacking them at home, she found a cracked shell. We returned the carton and grocery store replaced the box with a brand new carton of glistening shell-protected eggs for breakfast.

THat type of honesty can only be seen in the West, as far as I know. When Islam stresses so much on the respect of another brother or sister's property, there are Muslims who just turn a blind eye or two.

This is especially true for Malaysia.

Nevermind that the New Guy was just being careless and snapped Made in China's screen into two right in front of my husband's eyes.

On hindsight, I know there is a blessing in disguise. After all that ranting, I do have a husband who has a steady income. He supports a family, meaning I have children. I have laptop, which is in recovery mode, meaning I do have a job. The fact that I can pay for the repair shows that I do have some jewellery, even though I will be pawning whatever I have to save a poor guy's job.

Insha'Allah, by the fact that I have helped him, I will be rewarded by that and it will is some way give me some relief in difficult times.

"Whosoever relieves from a believer some grief pertaining to this world, Allah will relieve from him some grief pertaining to the Hereafter.

Whosoever alleviates the difficulties of a needy person who cannot pay his debt, Allah will alleviate his difficulties in both this world and the Hereafter.

Whosoever conceals the faults of a Muslim, Allah will conceal his faults in this world and the Hereafter.

Allah will aid a servant (of His) so long as the servant aids his brother.

Whosoever follows a path to seek knowledge therein, Allah will make easy for him a path to Paradise.

No people gather together in one of the houses of Allah, reciting the Book of Allah and studying it among themselves, except that tranquility descends upon them, mercy covers them, the angels surround them, and Allah makes mention of them amongst those who are in His presence.

Whosoever is slowed down by his deeds will not be hastened forward by his lineage."
(Muslim)